The Story of Elyse - Part Two

Once I was in the OR, I started to shake. It was cold and I was scared. Everything looked so much more serious than the tone of everything back in my room. I saw all the tools and screens and all I could think was to "just take everything a step at a time. The doctor has done this so many times and there was nothing to worry about. I was strong, the baby is strong." So they had me sitting up on the table with my legs hanging over. The anesthesiologist, was preping. I had heard the spinal was going to be the worst part, so I was really scared and nervous of all this "pain" about to come from the spinal. I had asked so many people to make sure Cole could be there for me through the spinal so that I would be okay. They said yes, and probably were wondering why I had even asked.

Everytime the anesthesiologist touched me, I jumped. Not a good sign. I didn't want to jump when he was actually sticking me with a needle! I explained my nerves to everyone. Also, I was worried I would do something stupid like fart. I mean, I was in one of those backless gowns, top of my bare butt open to the poor anesthesiologist. They were about to give me the numbing medicine for the spinal, and I had my doctor, a nurse, (Laura) and Cole all standing in front of me trying to distract me. Then the anesthesiologist warned me that I would feel a pinch and some pressure. Here was the moment.... and it was exactly as he said. It was a pinch and pressure. It was nothing. Getting IV's were much worse in my opinion. Then he again mentioned a little pressure for the spinal, so I clenched and felt a very small amount of pressure. I couldn't believe that was the most "painful" thing.

Once that was over, they had me lay on my back, arms out. They put a wedge under one of my hips, put a curtain up around my breasts and positioned my feet so the bottoms of my feet were touching. From there, the anesthesiologist sprayed something on me to check that the medicine was working. They put in the cathader, which btw was STILL uncomfortable,  I still was nervous it wouldn't take. But my dr reassured me that they wouldn't start unless they knew the spinal had worked. So the curtian is now up and I hear my dr say "can you feel this? I'm pinching you". I felt something, but nothing painful. I figured, maybe shes a light pincher? I later found out from cole that she was pinching me with plyers and if I felt it, I would have probably been screaming.

Also, since I had told my dr to not tell me what was going on, I had no idea what was going on. Cole told me right after the pinching, they sliced me right open. I was so oblivious to it all. From there, I could see Cole peeking over everyonce and awhile but he also kept me in the dark. During the time that they actually had me open, I was thinking they were still preping. I had no idea what it actually looked like to have a C section, thank goodness, and if you don't want to know either, avoid googling it. I made that mistake later on.

Cole was great. I was very nervous and the spinal was actually making me shake a lot. I could feel stuff going on around my stomach but it wasn't specific and it definitely didn't hurt at all. Everything just felt like touching, or tugging or pulling, but not in a painful way. I guess having a little one inside kicking you for a couple months gets you accustomed to that feeling. Cole told me stories of our lives to distract me. It was so helpful. With my memory having become SO terrible with the pregnancy, it was nice to hear stories to remind me of things like little things on our wedding day, past holidays, honeymoon, and the dogs. Then I hear, "you have a beautiful baby girl!"

As happy as I was about it, I tired to not 1. look, or 2. panic. Why would I panic? Well... I didn't hear her crying. It made me really nervous. Cole could see and he was smiling, but when he leaned toward me I said "I don't hear crying. Is she okay?" he reassured me that no one seemed nervous, or panicked or scared. She didn't cry, but the neonatologist was in the room and just standing back looking while the nurses were working on her. Another reason to not worry since he wasn't in there getting his hands dirty. I could barely see the top of her head through all the people. But I knew that I wasn't going anywhere since I was being put back together.

Originally, I was soo scared of the surgery that I asked Cole to stay with me through the WHOLE procedure and to not leave when the baby did. But once the baby was out, I told him to go ahead and go with Elyse. I was okay and we both wanted to know what was going on. They took Elyse to the NICU and Cole went with them. I was a little nervous (again) after Cole left because I then remembered that the longest part was them sewing me up, and I just let my main distraction walk out the door!! I guess I had to listen to the drs now. Thankfully they weren't talking about what was going on AT ALL! They were talking about the UW basketball team. Whew! Although I couldn't pitch in on the conversation because I didn't know much about the UW team, it was nice to be distracted anyways. Cole came back for the end and told me about our new little addition and how she was doing. I felt calm after Cole had updated me.

Once they were done, The curtain came down and I was rolled over to my room. As I had mentioned before, I haven't had surgery and was pretty impressed by everything. They had something under me that inflated and then moved me from the table to a bed, then that bed to my bed. They got me all settled, my dr came in to talk to me about how well the surgery went and some side effects I would feel with the medication. After what felt like an eternity, Cole came to the room and showed me pictures of Elyse. Then he was gone again!

I was so jealous that Cole was able to move around and see her. I felt completely fine (thank you meds) and wanted to jump out of bed and go, but I guess not being able to feel the bottom half of my body changes things. He came back to finally let me know that Elyse's transportation was here and they would bring her by really quick for me to see her before she was off. When I finally did see her, I was shocked. She was so small and I couldn't believe she had just come out of me. That my body (with Cole's help) was able to make something so amazing! Thats all the time I got before she had to leave though.

The whole experience was so surreal. After being in that room and that bed for 3 weeks pregnant, then returning and no longer having her there was just strange. I missed her already and was still in shock from everything. Needless to say, I did okay emotionally. Waiting to get out and see her, and finally being able to. I didn't break down a lot or cry too much. I was forewarned, and I knew what was coming and that all the decisions made were for her best interest. Those thoughts were calming.

So the night of June 18th 2011, Elyse Suni Van Gundy was born. She was 4lbs 13oz, and 18 3/4 inches long. She was born in Bellevue, Washington and transferred to UW Hospital in Seattle. After 2 weeks in the NICU, she was able to come home, where she is now :) Being loved

PS. Lastly, the most common question asked about the surgery has been "what was the most painful part?" To be honest, the most painful part was that after the cathader came out, and I had to pee for the first time without it, it was SOOOOO painful. I was upset that I wasn;t warned about this pain at all!!!