Friday, July 1, 2011

The Story of Elyse - Part One

So she's arrived!

Here's a little about how it went down and how shes been doing. Last I blogged, I was in the hospital, on bedrest. Busniess as usual, I was still on bedrest, the morning of Saturday June 18th. Felt a little drained and weak, but I assumed the effects of being in bed for three weeks were finally getting to me. My Dr came in and asked how I was as usual. I told her I felt fine, still leaking AF, and the only thing different was sometimes when I had to change my pad of AF, it was a little pink. The Dr said that was normal and if it continued to happen to let her know.

So about an hour later, I went downhill. I was starting to really feel sick and achy. Cole usually spends the morning with me on saturdays, then goes and run errands for the coming week, then comes back and spends the rest of the day with me. (yes, he's a very loving husband) So on this particular Saturday, he needed to go home, do laundry and get his hair cut. Just before he left the hospital, he knew I was starting to not feel well, and told me to let him know if there was anything I wanted. I just let him know I'd call him and let him know how I was doing. 

Once he left, I was still pretty miserable. The nurse came in to check on me, and I let her know how I was feeling and that I wasn't feeling great and it was getting worse. She told me that could be an infection, either with myself or the baby and that she needed to let my Dr know. I honestly didn't realize it could be effecting the baby since I had been sick a handful of times throughout my pregnancy, but I was glad the nurse was telling me and keeping me in the loop. After she had told the Dr, and I was put on an IV and NPO. I forgot what NPO stands for, but I know it meant I couldn't have any food or any drinks, not even water. This was a sign that they were thinking surgery.

The Dr comes to talk to me, and she does an exam. As suspected, the pinkish color in my pads was from dilating. There wasnt much, but I was about 1.5cm dilated and it would continue. My contractions were getting stronger (oh... did I mention I was having mild contractions throughout my whole bedrest?), there was no AF left, baby was breeched (definite c section), and my blood test came back saying I had an infection. Unfortunatley, the blood test can't tell us if it is just a cold for me, or if I was sick because of an infection in my uterus. So, knowing all this, it was best to have the c section that day.

Although my emotions have been up and down during the pregnancy, I felt that I would cry and the craziest things and have a heart of ice on others. This was one of those times I decided to cry. Nothing was really sad about the situation though. We were prepared that the baby would be early and in NICU, and we knew that everything that was being done was in the best interest of the baby.

But I felt like crying. I knew I needed to get it together and call Cole and let him know. But first, to get ahold of myself so that he didn't get freaked out by my crying. So I collected myself and called him. Once he said "Hey babe" on the phone, I did everything I could to fight back the crying, which came out as a shaky voice, which I am sure was WAY worse. Soo I let him know everything and that his little girl was coming today. He left the house so fast. He was a little sad I didnt tell him earlier that I was feeling worse and so he could have skipped a few errands to be there when the Dr was.

Once he got there, he too had to calm down and collect himself. He also had to tell our family about the change in plans....we waited a few hours before we did so that we knew as much info as possible. (and because we wanted to relax and not have our phones ring and beep like crazy) I have never had surgery before so this was a big deal in my mind. I wasn't sure if I had a high tolerance for pain or if I would pass out. I didn't really know what to expect as far as how "I would feel" throughout the process. Would I feel it? Would I not? Will I be dizzy? What kind of pain will I be in? Will I hear the baby scream? Will I get to see her? Will she be okay? Will Cole be able to be with me during the spinal? So many things were rushing in my mind and I know that no one could really answer those questions for me.

What I did know was that my c section would be around 7pm or 730pm, Cole could be there the whole way, I didn't want to know what was going on and when, I knew I would feel touching and pressure, and I knew my nurses pretty well for being there 3 weeks. I was extremely comfortable and confident in my Dr and even thought to myself that she was so extremely nice and I was so lucky to have a doctor that was so comforting. I knew that my baby would be named Elyse and I would soon be a mother.

As the time drew closer to when I was going to go into the OR, we were trying to stay calm and not let the nerves and excitment take over. We knew it was a busy day in Labor and Delivery but we really didn't think the most of it. Then our nurse told us some bad news. Due to the amount of recent pre term deliveries that day and the previous days, that they didn't have enough staffing to cover Elyse over the night. They would want her to have a nurse 1 on 1 if she has trouble breathing. So if she comes out with some trouble breathing, they will stablize her and then transport her to University of Washington Hospital. But if she comes out fine, then they would be able to leave her at Overlake. Unfortunately, they felt the chances of her staying at Overlake were slim and wanted us to be prepared.

This is when my emotions when to the ice hearted side. There was nothing I could do, and they were making the decisions based on Elyse's well being. So I signed the papers knowing I wouldn't get to be with my child for a few days after she was born. It should have been an extremely emotional and heartbreaking moment...which it was. But I was unable to so that. All I could think was "make sure she's okay!!! I just want her to be okay".

Finally, the time came. Cole was given his "dad suit", and I was given a gown and cap, moved to a wheelchair and brought into the OR. Never in my life had I been in one before and all I could think was "I'm coming out of this room without my baby, but still a mother".

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